[ david doesn't stop hacking until he's sure there's no life left in the man below him. until the spray of blood and crunch of bone and flesh stops even registering to his conscious mind, all just background to this. and when he's sure it's done, david just... stands there for a minute. through the mess, the rage on evan's face is still clear, and something about that makes david huff out a grim, tired breath of a laugh. how many times has he died with a similar look on his own face? especially out here, outside the trials where the fear of death isn't quite so pervasive. ]
[ weird, that. dying doesn't feel so real outside the trials, but apparently killing does. or maybe it's just because he's never done it before. david wonders if it's like this for everyone, the way he feels nauseous and electric at the same time. his hands are shaking, something he only notices when he drops the cleaver in the dirt next to evan's body, and that too makes him want to laugh. ]
[ he sits — falls, almost —against the wall, next to the body. heavy breaths that rattle and wheeze in his chest as he pulls his knees up, rests his elbows on them and puts his head in his hands while he tries to get his shit together before he drags his way back to camp. or maybe he'll just sit here and dissociate for a year. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
[ weird, that. dying doesn't feel so real outside the trials, but apparently killing does. or maybe it's just because he's never done it before. david wonders if it's like this for everyone, the way he feels nauseous and electric at the same time. his hands are shaking, something he only notices when he drops the cleaver in the dirt next to evan's body, and that too makes him want to laugh. ]
[ he sits — falls, almost —against the wall, next to the body. heavy breaths that rattle and wheeze in his chest as he pulls his knees up, rests his elbows on them and puts his head in his hands while he tries to get his shit together before he drags his way back to camp. or maybe he'll just sit here and dissociate for a year. ]